Demigodnapp!
by Makecrazymemories
Summary: In which Nico di Angelo does the most stupid and humiliating thing of his life.
1. Chapter 1

You know I always say that being the son of Hades is not easy. And because of that I have seen many stupid things done by gods and demigods alike. But never anything like this. Neither have I done anything like this. This just tops all stupid things.

Today I helped to kidnap a demigod (we think she's a demigod). Anyway, I helped my stupid boyfriend (he's not really stupid. But I am kind of angry at him at the moment so let's go with that he is) and he's even stupider(if it's even a word) father (this one really is stupid) in kidnapping a girl whom we think to be a powerful demigod (it may not be true. We may have kidnapped a normal mortal).

Anyway, it went something like this.

Apollo got punishment by Zeus for painting everything in Olympus bright yellow and gold. (He claimed it looked good, like him. Even made a haiku which I won't repeat and put all of you through torture.) So he was asked by Zeus to get a new demigod safely to one of the camps in the mortal way. So, Apollo being his old stupid self decided he needed the help of one of his kids. And for this he asked Will's help. And Will being his happy go helping everyone self agreed in an instant. But he wanted me to come along. So, Apollo in order to please his son before his task came to me to ask to come along with them. I refused. But agreed when the god begged me.(he was on his knees and everything. But after I agreed, he recited a haiku about how amazing he was).

So, we set off. Reaching New York we decided to go to Starbucks where Apollo was sure we would find a demigod. Soon after we sat down with our drinks, Apollo saw a girl sitting and reading a book. It was Greek. I guess the bells started ringing in his ears or something since he jumped up from his seat and continued to jump up and down till we calmed him down. It was embaressing in the then told us how we found our target. Or should I say a demigod. Apparently ge thought the girl was a demigod. (He thought, mind you. He wasn't sure or anything.) I looked at the girl. She seemed simple enough. Red hair, freckles. I tried to match her to someone at camp, trying to see if I can find her a sibling. But I couldnot. Not that all demigods siblings looked alike but you know to be on the safe side. I didn't want to kidnap a mortal and then having to explain to her what the hell we were doing. But aparently reading a Greek book was enough to maje her a demigod in Apollo's eyes. ("Come on, which normal kid reads Greek in the twenty first century"- that's the direct qoute of what he said after I told him about my suspicions.)

So, he came up with a plan on how to take her to camp. And since she looked about 16 it seemed hard to you know convince her. So, after much arguing(I threw a fit. Will tried talking sense to his father) Apollo pulled the 'I am god, so you better follow me before I transform you to a flower' card. I tried to shadow travel away but relented when I looked into Will's eyes. Those clear blue eyes. Sigh! I would anything for them.

So, I agreed to do the most stupid thing I have ever done in my life. Sigh! Dad may not be able to walk in all his full arrogant glory for months. Gods! Why did I agree again? Right, Will. Sigh!


	2. Chapter 2

Anyway, back to the task, as planned Apollo walked up to the girl looking smiling and greeted her. But the girl barely glanced at him, nodded and went back to her book. Apollo being his stupid self pouted. (I guess his self esteem notched down a few paces.) So, sulking he tried again. This time he asked if he could sit down, didn't even wait for her reply and sat down opposite her. The girl looked up at him irritably to which he answered with his best smile. The girl shook her head. All this time Will was outside waiting in the car. Then as planned (the plan was really stupid), I came up to their table with a black cloth in my hand. I wasooking stupid. A sixteen year old walking on his tip toes with a black cloth in his hand. But the people didn't seem to notice. No one even glanced at me. Yes! This can happen in New York. You can look as suspicious as you want but no one would give you a second glance until you actually do something. Anyway, when I reached the table I threw the cloth upon the unsuspecting girl.

She shreiked. I winced. Apollo did a happy dance as his plan was working. People looked at us. Some were coming to help the poor girl but they couldnot. Aparently the stupid god could use the did a war cry of 'Run biatches', threw the poor girl over his shoulder and ran towards the exit. Naturally I ran after him. A few people tried to nab me but I dodged was runnimg for his life even he was immortal. I was too, to be honest.

It was at that moment that everything seemed to slow down. The whole world was reduced to the speed of a tortoise or so it seemed to me. I was running after Apollo with everything I got. The store was not so big when we came in. It was the size of a normal store. But at that moment it seemed to be the size of the sahara desert or something. People were chading us shouting and hollering. A few were shouting "kidnappers" after us. I was sure that a few even phoned the police.

As we rounded the door, I saw two men coming towards us. They were trying to save the poor girl who was still shreiking. She was also punching Apollo's back. But he didn't even seem to realise it. Apollo did know a few things I guess since I saw him spin around in such a way that the girls legs slammed into the two men, making them fly away. We passed them swiftly and came to the roads. People were still followimg us. The car was down by the curb and we ran as fast as we could.

When I saw the car I immediately opened the back door where Apollo threw the poor girl and then dove inside himself. I got into the front. As soon as the doors were closed, Will pushed the gas pedal and we drove off (People were still shouting after us but soon we lost them.) I heaved a sigh of relief. Will grinned at me. "That was..." he began but I cut him off with a glare. But his father deemed to finish him since he said "Awesome. It was awesome as I am." And proceeded to torture us with yet another haiku of his.

We were on the way to camp (the whole way the girl was screaming and fighting against the cloth which Apollo still had hold on, tightly). As soon as we reached camp he took her to the big house the same way he carried her to the car and dumped her on the couch with a loud whoop. The unsuspecting girl hit her head hardly and passed away. But the crazy god did the macarena to celebrate.


	3. Chapter 3

"So you don't know if she really is a demigod?" Annabeth asked as soon as I recounted the tale to my friends.

I shook my head.

"And you kidnapped her from a store with cameras and didn't even hide your face?" Piper asked with her eyes wide.

Well, fuck.

We didn't even think about it. My face must have said it all since Piper gaped.

"You didn't think about it? Well, fuck"

I couldnot have put it better myself Piper.

"Language." Chiron said as he cleared his throat.

Piper went red but that was it.

"You are gonna have money on your head dude." Percy piped up. "Oh! Annabeth remember the time when I was considered a fugitive? Oh! Those days." He sighed leaving many to look at him weirdly.

Jason cleared his throat and turned his gaze to Nico. "Don't worry dude. We'll figure something out."

Nico sighed. Well, what else could he have done. Nothing absolutely nothing.

"Guys she's awake." Will came out running from the infirmary. "Come on."

Everyone hurried inside but Nico couldnot help but feel something is wrong since Will didn't exactly look happy.

When he reached the infirmary, Nico was actually hesitant to go inside but he did anyway only to find everyone with shocked and scared faces. It didn't take a lot for him to understand their terrible terrible mistake. (Or more importantly, Apollo's mistake.)

They hadn't kidnapped a demigod. Oh! No. They had kidnapped a mortal who now looks like she wants to die. Fuck. But, it also seemed that she was a clear-sighted mortal as she gave a shout of 'fire' when Leo's hair caught fire.

"Call Apollo." Apparently, Annabeth was the first one to come out of the shock. But, no one else seemed to come out of it since no one did as she told.

Will did after Annabeth repeated her request. He ran to find his father.

"Dude, you guys are fucked." Leo's said as he let out a whistle.

"Couldn't have said it better myself." Percy quipped from his place.

"Zeus is gonna trample you." Leo once again opened his mouth.

And, Nico could do nothing except agree with his friends. Though he didn't voice it. Holy Hades, his father would no longer look at him the same. Oh! gods.

Suddenly, Apollo or the stupid stupid god as Nico called him entered the infirmary with Will behind him. He was still strutting though he looked a little pale.

"Ummm... no probs guys. We'll just throw her out and kidnap someone ekse. Easy peasy fellas."

As, everyone looked at him Nico wondered how Will turned out to be half as intelligent as he is with a father like that.

And as Leo saod the next words, Nico could do nothing but agree.

"Well, fuck."


End file.
